In late 2006, Playtrek had a fun haiku contest, with prizes going to many participants. Hilarity ensued. Below are the results.
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First day of duty Transporting to a new world Red shirt means short life |
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Kirk, Spock, and McCoy Human, Vulcan and Geezer 40 years ago |
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Mr. Bill Eggler Closet Picard collector Left wing Kirk lover |
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King Dean Andrade Very cool cheesehead Trekker Can we talk toys please? |
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Ex-King Roberto Roger, Will and Holly fan No Sleestaks in Trek |
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Charles Apple writes High school crush is now divorced mid-life crisis now |
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Boy genius Ted cries Pluto stripped of planethood Kiss my asteroid |
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Who is most grating? Wesley, Neelix, or Guinan? Whiny bitch Kes wins |
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Rust on the saucer What on earth was Gene thinking? No car wash in space |
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Tapestry Picard Death for many collections Completists ANGRY! |
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Seven inches tall heroes of the galaxy Diamond Select Trek |
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Melissa query Haikus posted to the list? Or private email? |
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Marshall, not Roger The dad from Land of the Lost Get it right Chris Rei! |
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Thanks Art Asylum For some new neat toys Without you I would be bored |
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Thanks Art Asylum For some different new toys Without I'd be bored |
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Redemption Data The prize of my collection Thanks, J C Penney! |
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Beware the Borg! Your resistance is futile! So says Locutus. |
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She says write haiku I suck at this kind of stuff Guess I'll try this, though |
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First we had Mego Now it is Diamond Select 'tween them was Playmates |
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Oops, my bad, Marshall Sid and Marty were on dope Who flung Chaka poo? | |
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I hate exclusives. Damn, damn, damn, damn, damn, damn, damn. Damn mother****ers. |
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Brave Klingon Warriors Gleaming Blade catches the light Forever in song
Alternate ending: |
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Haiku form is hard 1,2,3,4,5,6,7 My brain hurts from this |
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I'm sorry to say 7 has two syllables Haiku rules broken |
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Haiku rules are hard 1,2,3,4,5,6,8 Bad count but good form |
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Brad was toy rival For Sat. morn Playmates toy runs Now were very good friends |
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Playtreker's commune Space Toys and other worlds Live Long and Prosper |
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Starship Enterprise Pride of the Federation Kirk's Warp Love Machine |
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The Right has the might The left is weak on terror Don't say on Playtrek |
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Kirk Spock McCoy Traveling the Galaxy Star Trek Forever |
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Star Trek collection forty years of merchandise fill closet and den |
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mint on card / in box in Playmates shipping cartons odds and ends displayed |
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My wife is very mad I collect way to many toys Playmates started it! |
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Little plastic men Imprisoned on stiff cardboard They see all you do |
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In boxes they Stay Toys with eyes that really see It's not when it's true |
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Playtrek, read by lots Lurker Appreciation Brought out a few more |
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My daughter age 3 Nathalie Suzanne Perry Likes Star Trek too :-) |
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Playtrekers post Haiku for honor and to amuse Playtrek contests rule! |
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Six-- no, dammit, five! Middle seven syllables Too many numbers |
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Playtrek, what the heck Haiku and limerick too Combination dreck |
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Is this off topic, If it's not about Star Trek? Let's talk politics! |
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The newsman Chuck Apple South of Mason Dixon line Drawing us the news! |
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King Dean is our man A new ISP he has To serve Playtrek well |
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Cha-ka flings no poo Evolved Pakuni he is See show and you'll know |
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Playtrekkers unite, finding one mint is our plight, but loose is alright... |
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And now for a word From our sponsor it does say The Playtrek tagline |
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I love Bill Eggler Just like a man loves his wife No, but not really |
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Please make me stop now I'm very much out of control With stupid haiku |
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In the bluish glow more messages keep coming Michael Heintz again |
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Some Playtrekkers Count Two Syllable Words as One Please use your fingers |
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Another Haiku, Contest filled with silly prose fills up my inbox |
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Go away this muck I dont need to press delete lest I'm overwhelmed |
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I bid you all stop Take this from my weary mind Lets just talk of toys. |
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plastic star trek men between four and twelve inches size doesn't matter |
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Tonight I watch my tape The T V roast of Shatner HHmmm, ..Do you smell ham?? |
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Shortpacks: bane of all So I buy up all the Shrans Soon: rich on eBay! |
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Celebrate your stash Rip those packages open! Be not a mint-ee. |
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Wander the toy aisles Seeking out the perfect head - Chop, carve, glue, paint, grin! |
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Master Reps triumphs Unobtainium is purged Harmony results |
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Trek goes CGI New FX will change the look Let ranting commence |
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Figure can't be found Must go to den of evil Welcome to ebay |
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AA makes great ships What to do with the others? Playmates, meet dumpster |
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Feisty one: Esoqq Limited one to a case. As rare as hen's teeth! |
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Star Trek poetry... Often rhymes with good reason Will you haiku, too? |
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Keep it Mint In Box Openers are evil folk We worship package |
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Saw an Esoqq once Didn't have money at the time Left with tears in eyes |
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Hey, all poems should rhyme Not to do so is a crime You should all be slimed! |
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What is this "haiku"? Playtrek has become a zoo I'm doing it too! |
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Roses are quite red Violets are colored blue This haiku just sucks |
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All this wrestling talk Smart or not, I just don't care Not on Sci-Fi, please |
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Stargate canceled now I'm so very unhappy Ten years, I have enjoyed |
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Supercalifra- gilisticexpiali- docious - just three more |
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multisyllable incomprehensibleness unacceptable |
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Star Trek - all the toys How many more do I need? Too many I have |
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An ode to New Force Feeding my habit, Rick does Drowning in peanuts |
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Resistance, futile Assimilated you are Says Yoda of Borg |
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Too many haikus So much time I have wasted Why did I do this? |
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Trek figures are nice Free from their plastic prisons they are meant to be |
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Where is Playtrek Spock Abducted by aliens We truly miss him |
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Political sage Bill Eggler is fun to read Please, may we see more? |
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Unobtanium The bane of my existence Now, we curse at thee. |
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Star Trek and Wrestlin' These do not go together Except on Sci-Fi |
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Star Trek is for geeks Wrestling is for redneck hicks Can't we get along |
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Wrestling is fake Winner is preselected SciFi is on drugs |
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Young wrestling fans buy SciFi is a ratings whore Bad program choices |
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No more good SciFi Hulkamania is king Stargate thrown to trash |
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Long haired guys in tights Take over SciFi Channel Geeks run for cover |
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NASCAR is boring Right turns must confuse drivers Waste of gasoline |
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Roller Derby Rocked Tough hot chicks kicked ass on skates Raquel Welch film too |
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Go, Roberto, go! Pulling haikus out his ass. This man needs a life... |
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It's the chase for some It's the having, for others Star Trek collecting. |
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I hate to talk in Haiku, but guess I have to as everyone seems is. |
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I can do it if I do it like rap, so you can clearly see here. |
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So, now I've forgot my point. Oh ya, it's Star Trek- Lovely show it is! |
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Wrestle on Sci Fi, wrong hair on action figures- is Playtrek talk now. |
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Diamond makes figures NICE ones! I buy most all, and extras for customs, |
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which brings my point I've made before- why now make heads so big? Who needs that? |
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What purpose is there to increasing head volume irregularly |
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by ranging amounts of ten to thirty percent? Customizing....h..a..l..t..s. |
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Star Trek's forty years where no man has gone before let's see what's out there |
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farpoint encounter all good things come to an end the sky's the limit |
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explore the wormhole fighting the dominion war what you leave behind |
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maquis and starfleet trapped in the delta quadrant transwarp homecoming |
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it's been a long road now a temporal cold war? federation starts |
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The new plastic smell The ripping of the cardboard Freedom to pose now. |
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My beau is madman Toys, scattered like blowing leaves The house is crowded |
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House now overflows hardbacks, paperbacks, crowd us I think...too many? |
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Dare I ask the group... Who won the haiku contest? I hope it was me! :-) |
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My apologies busy season hitting hard sorry for delay |
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Haiku contest done I knew I would not win one Try harder next time |
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Robert Potter who? Now is he a Playtrekker? He wrote no haikus! |
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A question I have Notice, I did, these haiku Yoda, we write like |
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Dare I ask the group... Who won the haiku contest? I hope it was me! :-) |
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My apologies busy season hitting hard sorry for delay |